Write Here, Write Now

My 90-day novel plan did not pan out… Jeff Goldblum says, “life finds a way.” In my case, life found ways to get in my way. My health and anxiety have been a constant struggle this year, and perhaps committing to a large project like this was too much for me to take on at this time.

But since I treat flashing red lights in my mind like a rave… I signed up for NaNoWriMo and found a group of writers to connect with anyways, and gave it my best despite everything else going on.

Yesterday, I was pretty depressed that I did not complete NaNo, and that I didn’t hit 100,000 within my time frame. I didn’t even sit down at my usual time to write like I had been for weeks. I waited until after 10:00 pm, and only managed 250 words, when I’d been averaging 1,500-2,000 per session. I beat myself up. I put myself down. I went to bed upset because I thought I was a failure.

Today, I’m giving myself credit for writing as much as I did. On top of working full time, caring for my house hold, siblings, pets, and managing my health … I found the time to write 55,000 words of a single story. In three months, I formulated an outline, a plot, characters, a magical system, and I wrote it down!

My overall word count goal is 100,000, and my current estimate based on how much I have written versus the amount of the outline I’ve covered so far… that is a low estimate. I’ve only completed five chapters, and have not reached the mid-point of the piece. I’m probably about a quarter of the way through the outline.

I am happy with the writing that I’ve done, and I know exactly where I want to take the story. I’m going to keep working on it, and I’m going to finish it. The deadline was only for me, and even though I didn’t meet it; the amount that I completed helped me establish a baseline for what I’m capable of within that time frame.

I did extend the deadline to the end of the year because I have holidays coming up where I can dedicate some more time to the project.

Do I actually think I’ll finish in that period of time? No. But I’m willing to invest the time and try. That’s all I can ask of myself at this point.